The 7 Questions Every Christian Couple Must Answer Before Marriage

Dating in 2025 is not for the weak. The apps, the algorithms, the TikTok gurus—they all cater to hookup culture and casual dating.

If you’re trying to date with purpose instead of just for fun, if you’re trying to figure out whether the person you’re with is actually “the one” God has for you—you’re the outlier. The oddball.

Welcome to the 1%.

The Equally Yoked Deck is written for you—the Christian trying to build something real with Christ at the center. These seven questions will reveal more in one conversation than months of “getting to know each other” ever will. They’re designed to go beyond butterflies and chemistry and expose the fault lines before before they can cause an earthquake.

Here’s what you’re going to do: Grab a coffee, sit down with your partner, and commit to thirty minutes with no phones. Answer each question individually first, then discuss together. Be honest—brutally, uncomfortably honest. Listen well. And invite God into the conversation, because if your relationship can’t handle His truth now, it won’t survive real life later.

Prompt: Ecclesiastes 4:12 talks about a “cord of three strands” that isn’t easily broken.

How do we keep Christ at the center of our individual lives—especially when we’re exhausted, overwhelmed, or doubting? Talk specifics: What does your daily relationship with God look like? Morning prayer? Bible reading? Worship music? Podcasts?

Prompt: Share the specific moment that convinced you this person is worth forever.

Nothing beats hearing why your partner chose you. Not the butterflies or surface-level attraction, but what they saw in your character. Maybe it was how you handled a crisis, the way you serve others, or how you responded when your faith was tested.

You need to hear this from each other. Because when marriage gets hard—and it will—you’ll need to remember why you chose this person of all the people in the world.

Prompt: Ephesians 5 and Genesis 2 talk about partnership, submitting to one another, and loving like Christ. What does that look like in practice for us?

This is where theology meets reality. Get specific. Talk through real scenarios—not hypotheticals. What does mutual respect look like when you’re deciding where to live, whose career takes priority, or how to handle finances?

Prompt: Name the thing—the habit, the quirk, the personality trait—that annoys you, that you’re secretly hoping will change.

This is an uncomfortable question, but a necessary one. Don’t get defensive. Don’t justify. Just listen. Then name those minor annoyances from your side—is it the way he avoids conflict? His lack of ambition? Her relationship with her mom? Her need for control? His spending habits?

Here’s the truth: don’t marry a project, hoping you can fix them later.

Prompt: 1 Corinthians 13 says love is patient and keeps no record of wrongs.

Life throws curveballs—illness, job loss, a coworker who understands you better than your spouse. These aren’t hypotheticals; they’re the marriage-killers nobody warns you about. How do we weather life’s storms without getting drowned?

Where do you stand on divorce—not theologically, but practically? Are there circumstances where you’d consider it?

Prompt: Matthew 6:24 is blunt: you can’t serve both God and money. So, who are you actually serving?

Let’s get specific: What’s your philosophy on debt? Is tithing non-negotiable? Are bank accounts separate because you want to have control over what you earn, or joint because we’re one team?

Money is the #1 marriage wrecker not because people are greedy, but because they let it become their master.

Prompt: Ephesians 4:26 commands us not to let the sun go down on our anger.

You need to know each other’s fighting style: Do you shut down and ice them out? Do you escalate and aim to wound? Establish the rules of engagement now: no name-calling, no leaving the house, no weaponizing past mistakes.

Every couple fights. But healthy couples fight clean. Unresolved conflict is a marriage dying by a thousand cuts.

Dating reveals compatibility. These seven questions reveal readiness.

This diagnostic deck checks the structural integrity of your relationship, finding the hidden cracks in the foundation before it’s too late. One couple discovered their clashing money philosophies and averted disaster. Another, confronting their toxic conflict patterns, chose to follow Paul’s advice in Ephesians 4 before making their vows.

So, here are your next steps: set aside a date, ditch the phones, and handle these questions with ruthless honesty.

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