# 41 | Unrequited Love

Some of us have tried the apps, the friends, the church groups — and are still (not-so-happily) single.

Almost always, it's not you. It's your profile. How you're being presented determines the quality of responses (think SEO).

So here's what we're doing this month: opening up 10 free profile reviews. No cost, no catch - just an honest look by an experienced set of eyes at what's costing you matches.

If you want in, click here, and in Section 5, give us the link to the profile you'd like us to check.

This week David Marumbao went viral on TikTok for calling off his $200K wedding because his fiancée said she supported Lindsey Clancy - and that was the straw that broke the engagement.

If you haven’t heard of this Massachusetts mom who killed her three kids and pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity, you must be living under a rock (and that’s a good thing, btw). Her trial, the live streams, cable news, women’s groups raising millions for her and treating her like a hero outside the courthouse… is pure theater, a psyop, for all we know.

Last week a judge declared a mistrial and it’s back everywhere again, pulling us all in. I thought I’d let this story slide, but then David drops his video - and it takes off like a rocket - six million views on just one platform.

He’s talking to the camera in his car, big cross on the neck, explaining why he broke it off. When he asked his fiancée about the case, she told him, “You’ll never understand what women go through.” And when he followed up with “What about the kids?” her answer was a nonchalant “Who cares.”

He wants us all to know he dodged a bullet - and if not for that serendipitiou two-second talk, he’d have married a monster.

I’m a skeptic. His demeanor, the cross, the way every major outlet picked it up in hours and how neatly it fit the agenda… I could smell it was staged. But who knows, right?

Now, what kind of Christian drops two hundred grand on a wedding without checking the core values - the deal breakers - first? How come he did not realize she was a monster until now?

We think we’re smarter than Marumbao, but I see people like him everywhere in singles spaces. A lot of people have thrown their list away because their pastor or mentor told them to. Others go the opposite extreme - one girl said she wants a guy who plays three musical instruments, has four siblings, and knows Latin dancing.

Most of them miss the most important thing. The core.

Robert Greene (of 48 Laws of Power fame) has Law 42 lifted straight from the Bible: strike the shepherd and the sheep will scatter. The shepherd is the core - he’s the strongest, the hub of power. You don’t have to take out every sheep. you just hit the shepherd.

For the Christian single, that core - the one principle that covers everything else - is 2 Corinthians 6:14. Don’t be unequally yoked to an unbeliever. Get this right and you get everything else right. You’ll have all the important boxes ticked: A person who’s equally yoked is a person who loves the Lord, who loves you, who’s kind, gentle, faithful, has self-control… the whole nine yards.

So don’t be a David. Do your due diligence early. Then you won’t have to break the engagement, you won’t lose the $200K, and you won’t wake up one day realizing you married a monster.

Give us the elevator pitch.
I grew up in a Tamil Brahmin family in Bangalore. In 2011, while living in Singapore, I gave my life to Chris. And that decision changed how I see everything. Since then I’ve built an independent life in the U.S., now working in private equity fund administration in Texas, while staying closely connected to my family back home. I’m looking for someone to build an ordinary, faithful life with.. the kind where people can simply watch us live and see God in it.

You were raised in a Tamil Brahmin household. Then something shifted in Singapore. What happened?
I received Christ in 2011 and was baptized the following year. It wasn’t a light decision, coming from where I come from. My faith isn’t just something I believe - it shows up in how I forgive, how I treat people, and how I keep going through the hard, ordinary parts of life.

What are you actually looking for in a marriage - not the Instagram version, the real one?
A marriage where people can see the goodness of God just by watching us live day to day. Someone who will pray with me, remind me of hope when things feel difficult, and believe, like I do, that God’s heart toward us is good.

What are your non-negotiables / deal breakers?
Gentleness in how he speaks. Emotional maturity. Someone who can carry me when I’m weak, and let me do the same for him. Room for honesty, room for grace, and both of us actually willing to grow.

Where does family fit into all this?
Right at the center. My parents and my sister’s family are still in Bengaluru. Any life I build has to honor both families while creating a strong, loving home of our own.

What's is something you’re standing on.
“Two are better than one… for if they fall, one will lift up the other.” Ecclesiastes 4:9–10

Vital Stats
Age: 40 | Height: 5'3" | From: Bangalore, India | In the U.S. since: June 2015
Education: Master of Commerce — Finance & Accounting
Occupation: Senior Manager, Private Equity Fund Administration, DFW, Texas
Denomination: Non-denominational

At the Oscars red carpet, Ethan Hawke, the actor playing Lorenz Hart in Blue Moon, was asked about unrequited love.

His alleged ‘off the cuff’ answer made the internet combust. Thirteen million views on one platform alone. Tens of millions of shares. People screenshooting it, journaling it like scripture… because it gave them comfort while they mourned their exes.

Here’s exactly what he said:

The one who’s in love always wins. It doesn’t matter if you get your heart broken; you’re living. When you’re feeling, you’re alive. The sun doesn’t care whether the grass appreciates its rays, right? It just keeps on shining. That’s you.

Yahoo! News reported one fan saying “This man is always spitting pure poetry.” And another: “He free styled that?? no script, nothing…. such heavenly Shakespearean poetic words off the top of his head?? Wow.”

People lost their minds over a quote that wasn’t original. It’s Anthony de Mello, recycled.

And more importantly though - the analogy falls apart pretty quickly - for anyone with half a brain and a second to think through. The sun isn’t shining because it’s in love with the grass. It shines because that’s literally its job. A tree doesn’t grow because it’s in love with the birds nesting in it. It grows because that’s what trees do.

Ethan’s quote is nonsense dressed in pretty words.

But mainstream media knows how to manipulate us, and we are willing suckers.

The reason this pedestrian quote went viral is not to crown Ethan as the modern King Solomon. It’s pure economics and propaganda - to get people into theaters before they realize it’s about a 47 year-old, closeted gay man, infatuated with a girl 27 years younger. So let’s reframe it and make it look beautiful, courageous and affirming.

The man saying this left his wife for the nanny in real life. And he’s preaching on selfless, unrequited love.

The character he plays, Lorenz Hart, is the walking opposite of everything in that quote. He was obsessed with someone young enough to be his kid. He wasn’t radiating light like the sun. He was frantic, possessive, resentful, pathetic. He drank himself into the ground and died from it.

So this quote isn’t just stolen and illogical - it contradicts the movie they’re selling us.

The PR team manufactured a soundbite. Ethan delivered it. The media made it go viral. And we, like sheep, ate it up hook, line, and sinker.

We didn’t know it was a ‘borrowed’ quote. We didn’t care Ethan was no authority on real love. We had no clue Lorenz Hart was gay and ‘omnisexual’.

All we saw was a pretty quote. And a pretty quote sells tickets.

That’s the whole game - the quote was never the point. It was bait, to get you into a theater watching a movie you had no business watching. And it worked.

Here’s the real point. The world sells us unrequited love. What it’s actually selling is lust dressed up as love.

What the Bible talks about is unconditional love. Agape. That’s the love God has for us. That’s the love a father has for a child - wanting the best for them, expecting nothing back. Those are two different things, and the media has done its part to blur the line.

Love unconditional. Not unrequited.