# 34 | Tradwife

For a movement that claims to be about simplicity, the tradwife phenomenon is far more boujee than it’s made out to be.

From the perfectly tailored dresses and pristine magazine-worthy kitchens, to the spotless children and rugged yet clean-shaven husband - this is what real domestic bliss looks like. Right?

The tradwife movement is fascinating because it emerged as a reaction to a very real problem.

We’re all tired.

Women are tired of being told that fulfillment can only be found through career achievement. Men are tired of relationships that feel competitive 24/7. Everybody is tired of burnout, loneliness, hookup culture, and the constant pressure to optimize every area of life.

So when someone appears online making sourdough in a sunlit kitchen while talking about family, stability, and traditional values, we all pause our doomscrolling.

I get the appeal. It’s ASMR for our ideal home life.

The problem is, the focus is no longer on the family, but on the performance, the visuals, and the sheer luxury of it all.

The modern version of traditional marriage usually focuses on appearances. Who is making the sandwich? Who is bringing home the bacon? And who is (trigger-warning) submitting?

While everyone loves putting the spotlight on the wife, let’s take a moment to consider the “trad husband”, according to the Bible.

And FYI, it’s eyebrow-raisingly demanding.

Apostle Paul writes: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” (Ephesians 5:25)

That standard immediately removes most of the men arguing about leadership online. Leadership in Scripture looks suspiciously unlike the version sold by the masculinity gurus who proudly claim on their Linkedin bios to have dated or slept with thousands of women.

Christ never lorded it over anyone - even though He quite literally is THE LORD. No, instead He sacrificed Himself. Served non-stop to the point He had to take breaks. Was the epitome of self-control in the midst of temptation and taunting. And He shouldered our burdens without demanding applause, even suffering abuse for it.

You have to admit, the bar is pretty high.

The biblical vision for women is equally challenging.

The woman described in Proverbs 31 is far from “submissive” in the commonly accepted “passive” sense of the word.

She manages resources, conducts business, serves her household, plans ahead, speaks with wisdom, and possesses enough competence that her family trusts her completely. She is the very backbone of her family.

The biblical wife is a true force of nature.

The world is (weirdly) obsessed with appearing traditional. Seriously. Why are we having wars about roles in the comment section, when instead we should be focused on character; on building each other up to be more and more like Christ?

Anyway, here’s the TL;DR -

A husband who quotes Ephesians isn’t automatically Christ-like.
A self-obsessed woman does not become virtuous because she bakes bread.
The end.

A tradwife doth not a good husband make. - Candice Mark

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